PSW Chapter 18: Bro, Stay Strong
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After an exhausting journey, Bastet finally found his way home. However, as he crouched in the shadows, gazing at the Pharaoh’s sleeping quarters, he hesitated.
Bastet curled his tail and seriously asked himself:
“You know, Yofar isn’t just any man—he’s the Pharaoh of Egypt. If he finds out that his future Queen and Consort both cheated on him… won’t he be devastated? His pride would take a massive hit…”
His little tail swayed, as if saying, “The hell are you even talking about, charcoal ball?”
Bastet let out a long, dramatic sigh.
"He may be an idiot, but he did help me once. And he is my litter-box cleaner… I don’t want to hurt him. Maybe I should just give him a hint?"
His tail kept flicking randomly.
Bastet, as if hearing it answer, nodded.
"Alright! It’s settled!"
—
Meanwhile, on the other side of the palace…
The face that made goddesses swoon was dark with stormy rage. Egypt’s ruler sat on his soft throne, gripping a report from his ministers—except, he wasn’t reading it. His piercing blue eyes were locked onto the palace doors.
After an entire day of searching, with even Nephthys personally investigating, they finally confirmed one thing: the cat was gone.
That furry little bastard had been playing them all for fools.
As she left, Nephthys, clutching her sore waist, sneered through gritted teeth, “Looks like even you got toyed with by Bastet.”
Then, without looking back, she went home to lie down.
Yofar’s expression turned downright terrifying.
The maids and guards trembled. They thought for sure the Pharaoh would execute the cat and vent his anger on them next.
But instead…
Yofar merely ordered all the carpets in his chamber to be replaced with white ones.
The relieved maids rushed to obey.
And so, for the rest of the afternoon, Yofar sat facing the doorway, waiting.
The guards wisely kept their heads down, wishing they could sink into the floor and disappear.
Then, finally—deep into the night—a small, pitch-black furball with two glowing green eyes hesitantly stretched a paw into the room.
"You finally decided to come back, little thing."
Yofar’s sharp gaze instantly locked onto Bast. He tossed the unread documents aside, his cold, brooding demeanor melting into a smirk as he stood, long legs striding toward the cat.
Because of the new rugs, he was barefoot. The white fur of the carpet peeked between his toes, leaving faint imprints as he walked.
The guards immediately understood the assignment.
One slammed the doors shut, while the maids swiftly sealed every single window, one by one.
Bastet, still oblivious, actually felt bad for Yofar.
"Meow… meow meow meow…" (Listen, you dumbass, do you even know—?)
"Wait, why are you grabbing me by the scruff?! YOU’RE ALLERGIC, LET GO!"
Yofar lifted the tiny black cat effortlessly.
It was light. Its luminous green eyes were filled with panic, its pupils shimmering with a thin layer of moisture. Its little mouth opened, revealing sharp but tiny fangs.
It meowed frantically, its tail stiff, ears pinned back. Its four paws flailed clumsily, exposing soft pink paw pads—but carefully refrained from unsheathing its claws.
Was it struggling because it hurt?
"Too bad," Yofar thought. "You pissed me off. You’re not getting away that easily, little cat."
Yet, just holding it like this, his simmering rage melted.
He frowned—not in anger, but in concern. It was crying too loudly. He wondered if he had grabbed it too hard.
...Forget it.
Yofar ignored the itchy rash already forming on his hand and shifted his grip, cupping Bast’s little rump with his palm before gently pulling it into his arms.
"I’ll let you off the hook this time… since you entertained me in the council chamber today."
"Don’t disappear in front of me again, Bastet," Yofar murmured, his lips curling slightly. "I had your bed remade—with tassels woven on all four corners, threaded with gemstones. You can bat them around. Happy?"
"Meow?" (Huh?)
Bastet tilted his head in confusion, taking a second to recall—oh yeah, his old bed had been confiscated.
But he was the type to forget grudges quickly, so he let it go. Besides, he had way more important things to say.
Bastet urgently stood up on his hind legs, placing his paws on Yofar’s shoulder. His face was dead serious.
Yoffar found it hilarious.
Still smirking, he pressed a kiss against Bastet’s wet little nose.
"Alright, alright. I forgive you, little brat."
Bastet: “…”
Forgive my ass! Why are you laughing?! You won’t be laughing soon!
"Meow! MEOOOW—" (Put me down! You’re allergic, dumbass! Also, listen—uh, don’t freak out, okay? So… do you know what a ‘green hat’ means? Wait, does Egypt even have that phrase…?)
Yofar absently stroked Bast’s furry little head.
"What?"
Bast: “…”
Yep. Figured.
Bastet sighed, then anxiously meowed nonstop, trying to explain.
Bastet: Green! Do you know what green means?!
Yofar: “…”
Bastet struggled to find the right words: It’s like… normally, there’s nothing on top of your head. But then, because your… uh… ‘special someone’ did that thing with someone else… now suddenly, there’s something on your head! Get it?
Yofar: “…?”
Bastet (exhausted.jpg): I swear, if I could talk like a human, I would!!
Taking a deep breath, Bastet waved his tiny paws in front of Joffar.
"Meow—let me give you an example, litter-box cleaner. If someone’s girlfriend cheats on them, people say they’ve been ‘greened’… So… yeah…"
Yofar frowned. While he usually found Bastet’s "divine revelations" quite profound, not everything the little furball meowed made sense. He could only guess at the general idea. Still, seeing Bastet’s strange expression, he patiently listened.
Bastet sighed in sympathy and patted Joffar’s shoulder.
"Let’s just say tonight’s feast will be… entirely green."
Yofar, having only understood that last sentence: “…Alright.”
Bastet, thrilled that his litter-box cleaner got the message:
"Meow!" That’s my boy! Look how calm he is! Absolute legend!
—
Thirty minutes later, they were really eating an all-vegetarian dinner.
Bastet hopped onto the table, unsheathing his claws and relentlessly shoveling green food onto Yofar’s plate.
Green? Grabbed it.
Slightly green? Still grabbed it.
"Whoa, this one’s REALLY green! What is it? Whatever, doesn’t matter—grabbed!"
"Oh, this one’s even greener!"
"And this one!"
He worked tirelessly, piling every single green dish onto Yofar’s plate.
Finally, once the table was clear, Bastet sat beside Yofar’s hand and looked up at him with deep, fatherly concern. Then, he gently patted Yofar’s hand with his paw.
"What are you waiting for? Eat."
“…”
Yofar tore his gaze away from his adorable little pet and stared silently at the towering mountain of green on his plate.
Among the pile were a bunch of grapes and a lotus leaf that had been used to serve roasted meat.
And then, this brave, intelligent, and battle-hardened young Pharaoh…
…suddenly understood something.
Bastet: Bro, stay strong.
Yofar: “…Heh.”
T/N: Please give support on my ko-fi page, thank you🍊🍊🍊
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